Mario Kart 8 is already spawning various clever tricks and tactics like fire hopping, but if you really want to leave the competition writhing in the agonies of defeat, you need to master this one simple approach.
UPDATE: No really, the Luigi death stare meme has made the national news in America, courtesy of – who else? – FOX News.
What a time to be alive.
ORIGINAL STORY: Usually these sorts of articles are step-by-step guides as to how to pull off some tricky move, using perfect timing and co-ordination to exploit some little quirk of the game and achieve victory.
But we’re not here to win races. If you think winning races is what Mario Kart is about, you had a very different upbringing to me. To me, Mario Kart is all about utterly destroying your opponents, reducing them to screams of outrage.
You don’t psychologically damage your friends and family just by clocking up faster lap times. You do it with blue shells. You do it with subtle, quiet taunts. You do it with knowledge of the tracks. You do it by win after win after win presenting a calm, unruffled demeanour. Don’t lower yourself by gloating or hooting your victory. Just sneeringly accept your infinite superiority and watch your little brother turn bright purple with rage.
Mario Kart 8 offers connoisseurs like me (and by now I hope you also) a perfect opportunity to add to your arsenal of sibling-shaming tactics, and it’s as simple as this: pick Luigi.
Gentlemen, ladies and other persons of quality, I give you: the Luigi Death Stare.
Compilation by KagatoTheFinalBoss. Thanks, Destructoid.