Thu, May 17, 2012 | 10:05 BST

French firm offers free dildos to Diablo 3 widows and widowers

French company Absoloo is offering free sex toys to those widowed by the just-released Diablo III. To claim, you need to post a picture of yourself on Absoloo’s Facebook page holding a copy of the game. You’ll then be sent a code with which to “adopt your new friend” from the Absoloo site. It’s not clear if the offer’s applicable outside of France, although we suspect that a sudden international crowd of pissed off, Diablo-burnt, dildo-hungry partners descending for hundreds of free cavity-based staffs of power (+1 vitality) may very well make it so. Thanks, Ugo.

13 comment-trail-alt Posted in: Action, Activision Blizzard, France, PC, RPG
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13 comments

#1

Telepathic.Geometry
17/05/12, 8:44 am

：Ｄ

#2

JonFE
17/05/12, 8:48 am

There’s a least one guy, who has posted his photo on that facebook page…

#3

Patrick Garratt
17/05/12, 8:50 am

There’s a few! Men have holes too ;)

#4

GwynbleiddiuM
17/05/12, 9:05 am

=))

#6

silkvg247
17/05/12, 9:59 am

See, whilst journalists write in depth reviews of why female avatars with skimpy clothes is sexist (when actually it’s just sexy, as is the female, full stop), they totally miss the boat on the more blatant sexism that the industry just gets away with.

Diablo 3′s launch is the prime example. The only girls I’ve seen in any news coverage wre there just to look nice, even dressed up / in cosplay ffs. They weren’t gamers.

And all over the place, I mean *all over* we have “jokes” about how D3 is gonna keep the boys hooked whilst the girls stay in the kitchen and in this case play with their bloody dildos.

To all of them: Fuck you. I play diablo 3 too, and fuck you for thinking only people with a dick would be interested in it. You’ve managed to once again alienate women from gaming, and eradicate any chance they might have had to take an interest or try it out and see what the fuss is about.

This might seem an over-reaction but I’ve had my excitement over D3 get pretty much erased by the fact that according to the entire industry I’m weird for wanting to play it in the first place. I should be playing with a dildo instead, or fretting over my “BF” playing D3, or some such.

#7

Patrick Garratt
17/05/12, 10:06 am

I deliberately didn’t mention a specific sex in that post for those reasons. I’ve added “widower” in the headline for the sake of balance.

But yeah.

#8

silkvg247
17/05/12, 10:13 am

It wasn’t aimed at you Patrick, though reading my post again I can see you might think that.. :)

It was just a little morning rant as I’ve seen too much “D3 is for boys” nonsense now.

Anyhow I completed Act II yesterday, woop woop :)

#9

Gekidami
17/05/12, 10:14 am

So is anyone we know on there? Mrs Pat feeling the Diablo blues? :D

#10

Patrick Garratt
17/05/12, 10:18 am

@8 – Nah, I know. I totally agree with you, for what it’s worth. My heart really did sink when I saw those press shots of the models at the launch in London.

#11

Da Man
17/05/12, 12:03 pm

Wow, nerd humor huh.

#12

DSB
17/05/12, 2:42 pm

Best story ever.

#13

ashleyvarley
20/05/12, 2:19 pm

Well the offer seems a bit vague and the sites not in English either. They don’t ship outside the UK! I own a dildo shop so feel free to roam mine with 15% discount off all products: http://www.sensationalsextoys.co.uk

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