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Borderlands 2 goes gold, ESRB description is rather hilarious

Saturday, 18th August 2012 18:27 GMT By Stephany Nunneley

Borderlands 2 went gold yesterday, and the best way to celebrate the occasion, is by posting the ESRB description.

We’ll just let you read it for yourself:

“This is a first-person shooter in which players join rebel forces to take down an oppressive corporation on the fictional planet of Pandora. As players explore open-world environments, they complete missions to gain experience and increase their characters’ skills/abilities. Players use machine guns, sniper rifles, flamethrowers, explosives, and weaponized vehicles to kill human-like characters and hostile aliens in frequent combat. Firefights contain realistic gunfire/explosions; injured enemies scream and emit exaggerated splashes of blood.

“Various weapons result in dismembered limbs or bloody gibs. Some missions depict intense acts of violence: viewing characters getting electrocuted; shooting a man in the face; killing players’ incinerating a cult member as part of a ritual sacrifice.

“The dialogue contains jokes/one-liners that reference sexual material (e.g., “I will hang myself from my own tombstone if in you I can’t put my bone,” “If there’s anything they love more than getting to second base with their sisters, it’s cars,” “Bacon is for sycophants and products of incest.”); during some sequences, players can find and collect adult-themed magazines—though no actual nudity is depicted.

“One mission requires players to consume three alcoholic beverages from a bar before they can progress. The words “shit,” “pussies,” and “asshole” can be heard in the dialogue, in addition to language censored by audible bleeps (e.g., “God-[bleep]-ing-dammit”).”

Sounds awesome. I’ve been re-playing the first on PS3 this past week to get prepped for it. Needless to say, I’ve died a lot, but I’m damned rich.

Borderlands 2 releases on September 18 in the US and September 21 in Europe for PC, PS3, and Xbox 360.

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10 Comments

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  1. TheWulf

    Oh dear, that is kind of amusing. Still, I call shenanigans. Has ‘gibs’ really become so mainstream that classification boards use it to describe gore? This surprises me.

    #1 2 years ago
  2. DSB

    And we have to wait a month :(

    Hmmm. I never did get through all that DLC for the first one…

    #2 2 years ago
  3. Stephany Nunneley

    I just bought the GOTY edition on console, but I haven’t downloaded the DLC yet. I already have the core game and Dr Zed on Steam, but I get sick playing it so close to the screen at my desk. No issues so far playing in the living room.

    #3 2 years ago
  4. absolutezero

    Yeah the FoV is all fucked up for Borderlands 1.

    #4 2 years ago
  5. SlayerGT

    Steph if all you do is play games to prepare for their sequels, you’ll never get to Dragons Dogma! I guess lucky for you, in your story about Capcom a few weeks ago, Capcom said they’re gonna make another DD..maybe before it releases you could play the first one…finally ;D

    #5 2 years ago
  6. Stephany Nunneley

    @5 My back log list is massive. I will be 80 by the time I get to all of ‘em. :) But no, I am just trying to get better at Borderlands so people will play with me in the sequel. :D

    #6 2 years ago
  7. SlayerGT

    On Xbox? Play with me and my buddies! We’ll cater to your skills. Besides there’s always “girlfriend mode” ;)

    #7 2 years ago
  8. jacobvandy

    @1 Why would that surprise you? The ESRB was created FOR the video game industry, BY the video game industry. Even if they weren’t full of people who play video games and make or have made video games and obviously know video games quite well, they’ve been doing this for 20-30 years. They couldn’t not pick up on such pervasive slang as that.

    #8 2 years ago
  9. roadkill

    Hey wincest is awesome!

    #9 2 years ago
  10. Dragon246

    I hope other ESRB ratings are just as fun. Cant wait to read it for gow-ascension.

    #10 2 years ago