“uDontplay”: Steam reviewers aren’t too pleased about Watch Dogs

Wednesday, 28th May 2014 19:04 GMT By Catherine Cai

Watch Dogs has probably been the most hyped game of the year… for the past two years. Did the game manage to live up to its ace marketing?

Steam reviewers, for the most part, seem to say no. In fact, all of the reviews under the “Most Helpful” category are negative. Most of them, of course, are decrying how poorly optimized Watch Dogs is for the PC. watch dogs review 1

watch dogs review 2

watch dogs review 3

Those that did manage to get the game going and gave Watch Dogs a positive review, still weren’t too positive about the experience.

watch dogs positive review

Ubisoft’s DRM has only ever been met with lukewarm reception at its very, very best (and even that might be a reaching statement.) For those that are still interested in getting Watch Dogs, you’ve been clearly warned. It might be best to pick this game up on console, or avoid it altogether.

Thanks, Kotaku.





  1. Gekidami

    PC Gaming.

    #1 7 months ago
  2. Sethos


    #2 7 months ago
  3. Legendaryboss

    So just like most Amazon reviews, huh?

    #3 7 months ago
  4. Erthazus

    @Gekidami Yeap. Not like console peasents that can’t review or post decent stuff on it’s platform.

    Btw, enjoy low-mid settings with 30 fps on your Praystation.

    #4 7 months ago
  5. bradk825

    That sucks. Hopefully they sort it out quickly. It’s a great game and it sucks that these guys are missing out.

    #5 7 months ago
  6. Hcw87


    Ironically the same thing happened on consoles as well, as Uplay is a service on both consoles and PC. You couldn’t play multiplayer on consoles when these issues were happening. You could go offline on Uplay though (PC) and play the singleplayer like you could on consoles.

    #6 7 months ago
  7. bradk825

    Guys, does this really have to be another PC vs Console thing? Frig, the discussions have been had, people will buy what they prefer and it doesn’t affect your enjoyment of it for someone to prefer something else.

    Can’t Watch_dogs gamers of all strips simply agree that it sucks a huge chunk of us can’t play right now?

    #7 7 months ago
  8. Reddpayn

    Its high settings and decent 30fps on praystation btw. But you know what, every platform has their flaws :\

    #8 7 months ago
  9. polygem


    i tried playing battlefield 4 at the ps4 launch…

    #9 7 months ago
  10. Xbone

    I just dont hany any symphathy for people who preorder. It may sound harsh but we should learn not to pre-order games without trying out the demo? Oh, no demo? Then we should use the second next best thing.

    #10 7 months ago
  11. Xbone

    @Xbone *have

    #11 7 months ago
  12. Legendaryboss

    Next best thing? Trying out the game at a friends house? Trying out retailer exclusive demos (Mario Kart 8)? Pre-ordering for a beta access (Destiny)? Waiting for a demo, timed or otherwise to arrive? Going to E3, Gamescom events etc to try it out?

    There is always the next best thing, through many avenues and one is a surefire hit. Or there is the devils doorway: pirates.

    #12 7 months ago
  13. YoungZer0

    Piracy is a greed problem.


    #13 7 months ago
  14. polygem

    Problem Greed is a Pirate

    #14 7 months ago
  15. CyberMarco

    #15 7 months ago
  16. polygem

    yep – good job :D

    #16 7 months ago
  17. Joe Musashi

    @13 Eureka!


    #17 7 months ago
  18. Darkfield

    And master race still wins because we have shitloads of far more better quality titles play on our 4 year old machines that run games in 1080p with 60fps and more details than PS4 or Xbox One. The truth is in just 2 years time PS4/X1 technology will be obsolete and forgotten, as it should be. Contemptible really.

    #18 7 months ago
  19. fearmonkey

    I don’t love u-play but its not as bad as origin to me. With U-play, the AC4 mobile app was alot of fun, and I could play at times away from the game and build up my resources. I’m not sure Steam offers the same functionality

    #19 7 months ago
  20. Cool P

    I had a few problems while connecting to Uplay as well, but managed to start the game online. Although I haven’t been able to find anyone to play multiplayer, I guess it must be a server problem.

    #20 7 months ago
  21. stretch215

    Master race? LOL.!!!! Masters of nerdiness, loneliness, and virginity more like !! I can’t believe you weirdos post some of the shit you do. What’s worse, is that I think you actually believe any of this bullshit matters.

    #21 7 months ago
  22. stretch215

    @18. Damn missing edit button

    #22 7 months ago
  23. CPC_RedDawn

    Absolutely ZERO problems here!

    Playing on my PC fine, no Uplay issues at all. I just set the thing to always login in offline mode. Creates no issues at all.

    These people complaining have got no idea what or how to use a PC.

    Also the game it self is epic.

    Oh and by the way console peasants even the PS4 version is set to a mixture of low – mid – and high settings. In fact the ONLY settings on consoles that is on high is textures. Everything else is on mid and draw distance, dof are all on LOW!!!

    As reported by their senior programmer on twitch.

    #23 7 months ago
  24. tiko257

    torrent ftw

    #24 7 months ago
  25. POOhead

    @Darkfield 60fps lol fucking noob you cant even do 700 you poorfag

    #25 7 months ago
  26. Nintendo1985

    Must admit, at the beginning I was intrigued about the whole hacking thing. But lately with what I’ve seen and read, I’m not interested anymore..

    #26 7 months ago
  27. TheSuave

    Its amazing how everything with some if not most of you people is pc is better than this pc is better than that master race this. Congrats you’re a broken record, if you enjoy a game you enjoy it for the story, characters, memorable moments, and yes graphics, honestly i could care less about graphics.

    This game is just like any other ubisoft game hyped up cause e3 made it look new and shiny but it is just a recycled modern day Assassins creed minus the assassins and killing. Honestly i havent got far enough to do any hacking and when i tried to join the open lobby thing it said “average wait time 3mins” i waited a hour and still nothing.

    Good times

    #27 7 months ago
  28. Samurai

    I don’t understand the hate for uPlay itself. It’s just of much of a DRM as Steam is, in the fact you only need to be online once to activate and you can go offline whenever afterwards.
    I understand the hate if it’s bought on Steam, as two DRMs for one game is always annoying.
    Does the uPlay hate just stem from bandwagon hate? I know uPlay was bad once with the always online AC2.

    #28 7 months ago
  29. The_Red

    @Erthazus I guess you missed the latest Digital Foundry comparison that found PS4 version to currently be the better than PC one (Of course due to optimization and other problems but still, right now it is the best one).

    #29 7 months ago
  30. Llewelyn_MT

    I have only one thing to say to those, who still preorder PC games, especially Ubisoft’s. Some people seem not to get it.

    One of the commandments of gaming, loud and clear: Never preorder anything but an indie game.

    #30 7 months ago
  31. NocturnalB

    @bradk825 Welcome to the last 4-5 years of the internet and gaming. A depressing hell hole where everyone’s a cynical, prejudgemental gimp who places way too much faith (and fact checking) on opinionated and sometimes paid-for reviews, and spend the rest of their time arguing about platforms, fps, and graphics because apparently that truly does take priority to a lot of people… According to the internet.

    #31 7 months ago
  32. NocturnalB

    Also to quote good ol’ Erth.. “Peasants”

    That’s literally how these people go through life thinking. They have such a warped sense of reality they view someone playing video games on a different piece of hardware than they do as a “lesser” to them. I don’t know if it’s due to having limited social interaction apart from what they experience through their computer and internet, or if it’s due to something else like an individual’s background, but it seems like it’s becoming more prominent. Truthfully you can go to just about any other site and the comments are just as negative and nasty as they get here.

    For that reason primarily, over the recent years I make a point to game with mostly only people that I know personally in real life, people I can trust to be a rational adult, not the next guy to right a manifesto and start another mass rampage. The rest of the online community I usually can’t even hear because my mic is either unplugged or I’m in a private party. It’s healthy advice more folks should try.

    #32 7 months ago
  33. Darkfield

    @POOhead @stretch215 You see the point of that comment was to provoke same sort of idiots as #1 and #2, I guess it’s easy right?

    #33 7 months ago
  34. djriful

    Day 1 bug isn’t that quite common for today AAA games?

    #34 7 months ago
  35. Gekidami

    It sure is easy, i literally only said “PC gaming”. Look at the rage.

    Funnily enough though, whilst you may have made post 18 solely to provoke, its hard to tell because the PC fantards on this site are prime examples of Poes law. They’re really that ridiculous, that spiteful and that much full of rage, all the time, every time.

    #35 7 months ago
  36. Darkfield

    @Gekidami The platform pride is ridiculous regardless. I love gaming and even though I spend most of my gaming time behind my PC I never approached the process with pride. Fans of all platforms are that ridiculous IMO, and coming on a topic like this one and saying things like “PC gaming” and “MASTER RACEE!!1″ is just a great example of it. Enjoy your fucking games, why would anyone take offense to people enjoy gaming on their favorite platforms? And it’s not like Console games hadn’t tons of similar issues in their lifetime, a lot of the Uplay bits of the issue affects all platforms equally…

    #36 7 months ago
  37. TheWulf

    Wait… I have an old PC and the people spending hundreds of dollars on unnecessary luxury items to play a game that works on older systems are referring to me as some sort of Master Race elitist? Forgive me if I’ve missed something, but I sense a degree of projection, here. Us PC owners aren’t the ones fapping over dem hot next-gen grafix, after all, are we?

    Bloody console owning elitists, always going on about how great their systems are, how perfect and lacking in flaws they are, rubbing it in the face of everyone else. Obnoxious buggers. :P

    And then, funnier, their systems suffer with the same issues!


    Does… does no one else see the stupidity of this? >_> Honestly.

    #37 7 months ago
  38. TheWulf


    I’d give you a medal if I could. It’s clinically retarded to have platform pride in the first place. I have a mild preference for open platforms because they allow me to do more of what I like (mods, indies, open source, et cetera), but I have no pride.

    Pride in your bloody product is utter stupidity. I don’t understand what kind of pleb you’d have to be to believe that a block of metal or plastic makes you better or worse than another person. It’s your brain that makes you better or worse, nothing else. It’s like how gamers believe that “cheevos” or “dings” are valid measurements of their worth, it’s ridiculous. Just the things we take pride in. It’s a fucking hobby, for entertainment.

    We play … FOR FUN. Just like those people who sit in front of the telly watching their shows. They don’t have TV pride, they don’t have cheevos for the amount or type of shows they watch.

    I find it actively aggravating how grossly unintelligent those of my hobby can be.

    And it is a hobby. For fun. It’s not creative or productive, and unless you’re playing a damned hard puzzler or strategy game, it’s not even clever.

    Where the hell is this pride coming from? Marketing brainwashing, that’s where! The herd hears the holy word of the brand and obeys, and it barrels downhill from there. They need to feel justified in having spent hundreds on a luxury item, so they allow the marketers into their heads, filling them with system pride, bolstering their cognitive dissonance.

    The smart person just has the platforms that possess something they actually want, not because they’re a brand. I didn’t bother with the PS3 until the end of it’s lifespan simply because there were only a smattering of exclusives that I actually wanted. Why bother getting them on release day when I could just pick them up later for dirt cheap? And I don’t support exclusivity, either, because it’s just a feedback loop into brand pride.

    I have these games. So I’m proud. Proud. Proud. PROUD!

    Yeah. That’s a reason to be proud. Owning things. For entertainment. Uh-huh.

    I’ll never get over the sheer stupidity of it. Of the herd in general.

    So I play games on a PC, a tablet, a PS3, a Wii, and a 3DS. I guess that means… I’m a Master Race PC elitist because the Evil Letters are there. It’s like some form of tribal bullshit.

    Buy what you want. Have fun with it. What I’m trying to get people to realise is that there is no fucking ‘Master Race,’ on either side. It’s just people being shameless imbeciles, nothing more, dancing around with their ‘Platform Pride.’

    What next?

    XBox Pride Day? Where we have a march through the streets with people wearing the logo, and carting along balloons of recognisable branded figures? Master Chief, followed by Marcus Fenix, and so on, and so on? Or a PS3 day with similar things going on?


    Just stop.

    Stop embarrassing me by extension. It’s a thing. It’s a hunk of plastic/metal. You play games on it. The end.

    #38 7 months ago
  39. Legendaryboss

    Yeah this thread got fucked up while i was sleeping, let me check in the piracy one.

    #39 7 months ago
  40. Hcw87


    Not sure if serious. I’m playing Watch Dogs at 1080p With everything maxed (yes, even textures at Ultra) at a superior framerate compared to consoles. How does it make sense that the PS4 version is better compared to that?

    I don’t even have the stuttering problem people are talking about, the game is running flawlessly (4700k at Stock+780ti).

    So no, there is no way in hell any console version of a game is ”superior” compared to PC. That’s just pure hard facts.

    #40 7 months ago
  41. TheWulf

    And for what it’s worth? I love watching Netflix on the PS3. Why? Not for platform pride, that’s for sure. No, because I think it has by far the best client. That may change when Netflix switches over to HTML5 and it becomes more enjoyable on other platforms, but as of now the PS3 one is the best. It was available to me, so I use it.

    I use it because it’s the best option for me, not because of pride, but because it’s something I like. I like the feel of the PS3 client in general, I like Max, it’s great. That doesn’t mean that I suddenly have the need to put up a flagpole in my back yard to show my pride via a PSN flag, it doesn’t mean that I need to buy boxers with Nathan Drake’s face on them (especially since I don’t think that Uncharted is a particularly good game in the first place). I use it… because I like it. Can you even imagine that concept?

    I’m a hobbyist coder, too. I love watching game jams happen because of that, and one day I might even participate in one. I can appreciate game development for what it is, and the PC is the primary platform it happens on. The PC has the best tools for that, much in the same way that the PS3 has the best tools for watching Netflix. I like being a part of the development process. From Kickstarter to Early Access, from Game Jams to Open Source, from Mods to Indies, I just like the process.

    I like modifying my games because that’s an option available to me. I like the PC because it has the tools to modify games. If I want to modify my experience in a game, the PC has what I need to do that. I don’t take pride in that, not at all. I do, however, take pride in the development process. When I make something myself, or when people I’ve been routing for make something incredible. Those are things worthy of pride, not the platform, but the incredible things people do.

    If we all had more respect and pride for and in the creative person, rather than the mass-produced product, then this world of ours would be a much better place to live in. At least, I think so. So, where do I sit? I don’t have pride in any platform. I use each of them as I wish. If I want to lie in bed and browse, or play time wasters, I’ll use the tablet. Sometimes I’ll even watch Netflix on it, in a pinch. I’ll also play the games I like for the consoles I chose to own, things like Ratchet & Clank and Lair, for example.

    So, I play games on handhelds, mobiles, consoles, and computers? How do your one-dimensional labels apply to me? This is the problem, labels so basic are only there to help less intelligent, less perceptive, less perspicacious people with understanding the world around them.

    When you call someone a ‘Master Race elitist,’ that’s just a one-dimensional label, because you haven’t explained why it applies or what it really means. All you’re doing is putting your innate stupidity and overall lack of humanity on show. You’re doing the Internet equivalent of running through the streets, naked. It’s every bit as bad as flashing, because no one with any intellectual worth wants to look at it.

    So before you go to insult someone for what they play games on, next, think. Think before mind-streaking. Think before putting your naked stupidity out there for everyone to see. I don’t want to see it. And as a gamer, I’m embarrassed by extension by that stupidity. Think. Think. Think. Think. Think some more. And think some more. And then. And THEN… put the labels away.

    Let’s just play the damned games.

    #41 7 months ago
  42. Gekidami

    The Wulf, not elitist. Comedy post of the year. But he’s right, pride is stupid we’re all games here! Its not ‘serious business’!

    …Now stop supporting consoles your brand tribals, you herded brand animals, you disgusting introverts. And remember that the Wulf isnt any of these things, he’s above such things, more evolved.

    Yep, not elitist. Just narcissistic.

    Just thought i’d give something back for once. And even then, i only posted one word and an abbreviation. We’re miles from every articles about console specs, FPS and/or resolution getting visited by the usual Erthazus, Panthro & Wulf posts with several others crawling out of the wood work.

    #42 7 months ago
  43. lubu

    so 30fps version that dips to 24fps is the best one ? no thanks. i’m running it at 50fps on ultra & 1080p. so my version is the best :))

    #43 7 months ago
  44. Gekidami

    “Put the labels away.
    Let’s just play the damned games.”

    What a fucking hypocrite.

    #44 7 months ago
  45. Legendaryboss

    Oh it isn’t over.

    #45 7 months ago
  46. Darkfield

    @Gekidami Yeah I know what you mean, but it’s better to ignore those comments, it’s even hard for me to ignore similar remarks sometimes, but in the end we play games because they are fun, it’s a hobby. Not a lifestyle, not a way of life which will improve as you upgrade your platform of play. Your reasoning on deciding to play on platform you play is purely subjective, it’s how you like it and the sooner people realize that the person who plays on XBox or PS or PC or a nintendo device isn’t their enemy the better. I prefer PC with reasons similar to Wulf’s, heck I haven’t even upgraded my PC for such a long time yet.

    It’s ok to be passionate about gaming but when it goes overboard, it stops being fun, not just for others but for yourselves as well.

    @TheWulf you know I always liked the phrase “Master Race Elitist” because I’m a Chaotic Evil type, so it goes well with my online personality :D but it’s just for fun I don’t really consider any groups of gamers superior or inferior to each other. It’s just gamers with different priorities. Some have time, some don’t, some like PC, some like consoles, some even like both – big deal! enjoy it how you want but stop those being a jerk about it.

    #46 7 months ago
  47. Reddpayn

    I think that my ps3 version is infiniteX better than the pc version. Ouh, i mean GTA V.
    And watch dogs is also worse than it in every possible way, sometimes even in graphics ;D

    #47 7 months ago
  48. OlderGamer

    A shit game is shit. And bad DRM is bad. Has nothing to do with pc vs console. And where is it written in the bylaws of gaming that gamers Can’t own consoles and a gaming pc? I do. Stop being so insecure about what toy you play with.

    #48 7 months ago
  49. LikkiCurry


    Oh, feeling entitled by your own penis there, tool? Bad news: it lies to you, you don’t need to fuck in order to be be happy. Unless you appeal to be at the same level with my dog, which I’m assuming you’re already are anyway. Sad, pathetic excuse for a human, who will die without a woman to breastfeed him.

    #49 7 months ago
  50. DarkElfa

    Once again proving I’m right in my boycott on Ubi against their Uplay system.

    #50 7 months ago
  51. theduckofdeath

    @Reddpayn That’s what Ubisoft claims. They also claimed that the graphics haven’t changed since the E3 2012 reveal.

    #51 7 months ago
  52. Panthro


    What exactly have I done/ said that thinks you can lob me in a negative comment alongside TheWulf.

    I own a PS4, is that not good enough for you? Do I need to have a weird devotion to the console in order to have a valid opinion about it? Do people who own a console only have to say positive things about them?

    Yes, I like my gaming at 60fps and at a high resolution and the PS4 keeps lagging behind in that department and I think its pathetically funny in most cases.

    I just want to know how you have came to a conclusion that I’m like ‘TheWulf’ and other’s like me ‘crawl out of the woodwork’ like some type of vermin… I should be quite offended when I think about it.

    #52 7 months ago
  53. sebastien rivas


    Fucking seriously, how can you give a single shit about those reviews when they are 3 to 4 hours game time.
    We are not dealing with a side scroll game not a point and click adventure game.

    Stop being such pussies because it is a major AAA companies who tried to deliver with challenges and all sudden you want to suck your mom’s tits because it is Watchdogs.

    Go in, explore, and think tank!

    #53 7 months ago
  54. sebastien rivas

    To make it simple guys about ELITIST.

    Whoever says elitist to another simply and greatly lacks of confidence in him/herself.
    I do not know in what regards the second person should give a dam shit of its own spec to that first person waving his/her finger “elitist”.

    Some really need to grow balls!

    #54 7 months ago
  55. sebastien rivas

    and yes my PC rules and no, I do not only use it for gaming

    #55 7 months ago
  56. BrokenSpline

    I have played this on the PC for 10 or more hours and was even able to have quite a few “intruders” in my games which I absolutely love. My only real gripe is even with Ultra the game looks flat and stripped of color especially since the 2012 reveal. This game looks far worse than Assassin Creed 4. Thankfully the gameplay is a lot of fun and the threat of having other try to hack you makes it even better. I can’t wait for a sequel.

    #56 7 months ago
  57. kisame

    crack it and so long simple as that

    #57 7 months ago

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