Armor expert expounds on women’s battle armor

Friday, 16th December 2011 23:18 GMT By Andrew Groen

Most of us have recognized at this point that women’s armor in video games is generally ridiculous. Barring a few scarce exceptions, women’s battle raiment leaves them underprotected and in some cases, in more danger than if they’d gone to war nude. An armor expert explains.
Armor creator Jabberwock spoke a bit about this issue this week.

“That there, that is a boob plate,” he said of the picture below. “I made that one. The woman in the photo asked for it to be like that. She fights in it. I worry constantly that she’s going to fall hard and it will crack her sternum, even with the padding. Note also that it seems almost perfectly designed to guide sword points and arrows into her heart. They still have to penetrate the armor but, honestly, that’s a design flaw. However, it looks good and makes her feel sexy and badass at the same time. That’s important too.”

He also talked about other types of armor as well. “Plate armor is the way it is largely out of necessity,” he said. “The layout and articulations of the plates are the best solutions the designers could come up with to balance mobility with protection. Also, note that nobody was naked under their armor. There was a ton of padding between the metal and the flesh that absorbed the energy of the blows. That means the difference between male and female plate armor is relatively trivial because once you’ve padded it out and left space for movement, you’ve all but erased the figure of the person inside.’

So game developers take note: boob plates are unrealistic, and plate armor should look nearly identical whether it’s worn by a male or female.

Mad Art Lab via Kotaku.



  1. LOLshock94

    burger nipples

    #1 3 years ago
  2. Yoshi

    QQ I find this article offensive. It hardly mentioned the overly muscular armour for males and how uncomfortable that must be and how offensive and insulting that could be to people not so muscular.

    #2 3 years ago
  3. Talkar

    While we’re at it, medieval swords weren’t designed to cut people in half, but instead crush the bones under the armor, just one other of the thousands of design flaws in games xD

    #3 3 years ago
  4. fearmonkey

    That picture kind of looks like the silver surfer got estrogen shots :)

    #4 3 years ago
  5. DSB

    @3 That doesn’t make a lot of sense. A mace or an axe would do a far better job of that due to the weight distribution.

    #5 3 years ago
  6. frostquake

    We don’t play these types of games for realism…LOL. If you want Realism go play Minecraft! ROFL!!!!

    #6 3 years ago
  7. Mattigan

    @DSB 3 is actually correct, no matter what you see in the movies, medeival broad swords were little more than flattened out steel bars, and it was not uncommon for them to be used like a hammer with the blade being used as the handle while the pommel and guard would be use to smash bones and armour.

    #7 3 years ago
  8. Uncontested

    The medieval broad sword was not designed to ‘crush’ anything.. granted it was not sharp by any means.. that was by design.. The way the blade was designed was when it contacted armor (Preferably at a right 90 degree angle) it would cut through the plate armor like butter, that is why armor is so ’rounded’ because it made it much harder for the blade to make that 90 degree angle and was more likely to ‘glance’ off the armor instead of liquify it and hack into the person.

    also there is no such thing as a ‘blood groove’ the reason the center of a broad sword is like that is because it made it more ‘structurally’ sound for smashing into things…

    #8 3 years ago
  9. Freek

    They’re not design flaws, they’re deliberate choices. Most games are not simulations of medeival combat. They are power fantasies, things that are not trying to be real but simply to be fun.

    #9 3 years ago
  10. Mattigan

    The groove is not to make anything more structurally sound, it is quite simply an efficient way to reduce weight without compromising on length or strength, nothing more. The lighter the weapon the more easily you can try to hit your opponent with it.

    #10 3 years ago
  11. Gekidami

    Isnt curved armour actually harder to penetrate? Seems like booby plates have some advantages.

    #11 3 years ago
  12. viralshag

    @ The second Pic:

    “I can totally see my face in those!”

    #12 3 years ago
  13. fuchikoma

    Mattigan is right. The fuller (groove) just lightens the blade, which can really add up for a sword.
    Broadswords are not for bashing armor in – realistically, in armored combat, you would grab the flat of your blade and guide a thrust into the joints or other weak spots of your opponent’s armor. Why try to overpower something designed to keep attacks out when you can just go around it?

    #13 3 years ago

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