When Infocom Meets Media's Favorite Man-Eating Shark
Tired of watching those old VHSes, why not play through the experience instead -- as the shark itself!
This article first appeared on USgamer, a partner publication of VG247. Some content, such as this article, has been migrated to VG247 for posterity after USgamer's closure - but it has not been edited or further vetted by the VG247 team.
Man, being a shark rocks. All you have to do is float serenely through the oceans and eat people. Sometimes, you even get to have just the eyeballs for dessert. This is the life.
As spotted by the ever illuminative BoingBoing, this version of Jaw's is an absolutely splendiferous re-imagining of the classic tale and such a loving tribute to the days of ZX Spectrum. I loved the dark, quiet humor that suffuses the game. Though they certainly would have been forgiven (and even celebrated) if they had chosen to go with visceral, splatterpunk-happy prose, it's kind of nice that they didn't. The shark seems almost innocent in this version. You don't messily devour someone, you 'nibble playfully at her toes' before consuming the rest. The waters aren't a fetid pool of entrails, they're reassuringly bloody.
Almost everything in Jaws: The Text Adventure is edible. At least, from your persona's eyes. Much of my personal delight with the game comes from paddling up to a new object and wondering if it can be used to fill my belly. Without giving too much away, you'd be surprised at what this Great White can stomach.
The climactic fight in Jaws is present and accounted for. However, depending on what you've consumed along the way, there's a chance you might find yourself with a vastly different ending. Overall? Jaws: The Text Adventure is a delight. Unless you hate reading. And must have graphic depictions of someone's innards in every books. If such is the case, you probably will not enjoy it.
Everyone else, though? Start your weekend with a shark already.