You're in the best shape of your life. For the past few months, you've been exercising regularly, replacing the base of your food pyramid - which just said "cake" on it - with actual food, and turning your body into something that's not basically all the downsides of smoking without any of the fun.
Why? Because a new videogame's coming out, and with Kinect at the wheel, your marathon gaming session's more or less become an actual marathon.
Fortunately, according to Microsoft, this harrowing vision of the future won't come true.
"Kinect can be used while sitting when an experience is developed with sitting in mind," a Microsoft rep told Joystiq, mirroring E3 comments made by Aaron Greenberg over an IGN report stating the same thing.
Microsoft had earlier said that it'll be "natural for Kinect games to be designed to get you off the couch: dancing, running, dodging, bending and kicking."
Shortly after, speculation erupted and rumors spread that if you weren't standing, Kinect would be as blind as a Jurassic Park T-Rex in a room full of statues.
According to Microsoft, software like the ESPN, Zune, and video apps serve as examples of "experiences where we expect people to be sitting."
So for those who can't stand standing, don't worry too much. No matter what you do with Kinect, you'll pretty much always look silly. But at least it won't hurt.