AU News Wrap, August 30 - What happened today

Oh, balls, I did finish on time. Typical.

You know what that means, don't you: There is no excuse. I have to go to the dentist. It's not that I don't take care of my teeth, and I've never been nervous about it before, but I literally haven't had a check up in at least six years, what with the international moves and all. I fully expect to come home with dentures. Woe.

Head back further in time with Johnny's wrap. No Bulletcast video again today, I expect, because Pat's still in Sweden with Chris, Colin, and ... what was its name? Oh, yes, Battelefield 3. I quizzed him and it turns out our readers are way more handsome, intelligent and delightful than anybody else on the trip, which only confirmed my suspicions.

Here are today's headlines; you may want to scroll down a little anyway, as Johnny popped up and started vomiting news like a four year old at an unlimited cake party, and I'm rudely leaving them out, since he always doubles up regardless. Humph. Anyway, we started off with a number of contributions from Deb:

• Special Skyward Sword bundle to ship with Gold Wiimote Plus
  It'll stay shiny forever, since this is likely the Wii's last game.
• Professor Layton and the Last Specter, Tetris: Axis dated for US
  Release dates: Like normal dates, but nobody slobbers in your ear during the movie. Or do they? Where was I going with this analogy?
• God of War: Origins demo releasing on PSN tomorrow for PS Plus subs
  Oh, you're not a subscriber? Pleb.
• Off-screen Uncharted 3 gameplay video features sandstorms
  Shakycam! In the filmmaker's defence, it looks quite windy, ha ha.
• Pre-order Sony 3D TV bundle before Sep 30, get Resistance 3 for free
  Sony makes it official.
• The Secret World beta registrations open - really
  Back to me now. Seriously guys, Templars. Why would you ever choose anything else.
• Minecraft not on Steam due to restrictive ToS
  Steam is fantastic - but in its current state, it's just not the right platform for some content.
• Battlefield 3: Troedsson talks frame rate, Origin, and mod tools
  The frame rate thing is interesting. How many of you can actually identify it I wonder?
• Fake - Modern Warfare 3 to sport 32 player deathmatch, "Bomb Mode"
  This is so stupid.
• Metro: Last Light won't be a "flawed masterpiece"
  I wouldn't mind making a flawed masterpiece. At least it's a masterpiece amirite.
• Counter-strike: Global Offensive to feature ranked matchmaking
  It sounds noob-friendly, but they're not aware of the depths of my noobiness.
• Quick Quotes - Dark Souls as a 'super mean sensei'
  Grasshopper, you have much to learn. Like, hold your shield up, for reals.
• Mass Effect 3 will be the end of Commander Shepard
  Nooooooooo...!
• Australia: Last chance entry to 3DS Ambassador Program
  Get your skates on. Let's not have a repeat of the PSN Welcome Back Package I-left-it-to-midnight-on-the-last-day thing.
• Moore: NBA Elite "not walking off the court crying"
  A beautiful headline quote from the delightful Peter Moore. If only he'd said a swear, too.
• Dishonored allows pure stealth, no-kill approach
  So much interesting stuff going on in gaming all of a sudden - lots of survivalism, consequential choice, interesting design choices.
• Four slots left in $1 million Call of Duty XP tournament
  Make money the easy way - by being the best in the world at a very high level motor skill!
• Deus Ex: Human Revolution offers coded puzzle
  When I saw this, I thought "oh I guess I didn't get the message and everyone else did". Because I'm an idiot.
• Tuesday Shorts - Deus Ex giggles, board games, and music
  Hooray the shorts! That... that means it's nearly time for the dentist.

Today's header image is Cee Lo Green, who is probably best known now for his viral hit "F**k You". But he had a couple of great albums before that, is half of Gnarls Barkley, and has an illustrious list of collaborations. Also, the man knows how to dress, yowza. Much love.