Update: Don’t Get Caught has prematurely ejaculated – its listing on Nintendo Switch was an “accident”, according to its developer. Who among us hasn’t accidentally advertised our game about wanking in the back of a car on Nintendo’s storefront?
The update comes via Nintendo Life, who the developer reached out to and cleared up its whoopsie.
Original Story: Nintendo, that company known for family-friendly titles, is somehow letting a game release on Switch next week where you wank in the back of someone’s car.
In case you’re not familiar with the concept, a “danger wank” is where you spaff one out in public. You can increase the danger by shouting someone and trying to finish before they arrive. I don’t think anyone actually does it, but it’s very popular to joke about in UK schools.
The game is called Don’t Get Caught and casts you as a hitchhiker who thumbs a ride before palming their pud. The idea is to jack it to polaroids (I swear I’m not making this up) without being caught by the driver.
Oh, and there’s also a creepy doll next to you who can catch you charming the snake as well. I need to bleach my eyes now, but you can watch the trailer below:
It’s coming to Switch next week so you can beat your meat, bash the bishop, prod your rod, and desperm your worm on a Nintendo console soon. I hate my life.
I can’t believe this is something you will actually be able to play on a train, using a console with neon handles. The game isn’t showing up on the eShop website, but we found it on the console on the EU store. Perhaps, like our protagonist, Nintendo is in the process of pulling it.
Thanks and not-thanks, Nintendo Insider.