GTA Online: 8 reasons why I’m losing my shit over the lowriders update
I woke up this morning and my Twitter timeline was not full of abuse. Instead it was full of GTA Online players genuinely losing their shit over the upcoming lowrider update. I felt the same last night when Rockstar sent out first details of next week’s free DLC. I had to get up and walk around my seat. Pacing around and grinning like a twat. Lowriders!
Did I ever mention I obsess over hip-hop? Of course I did, I never shut up about it. This lowrider update, this is what I’ve been waiting for. I’m listening to Kurupt, Mack 10 and Daz Dillinger as I write this. Here’s eight reasons why I’m flipping a nut over polished chrome and the chance to hang that shit.
Update: Get a glimpse of a load of new lowriders in the official trailer.
Bobbleheads, custom plates and velour upholstery
The whole point of customising your ride is you sweat the little details. Look at that sweet, soft upholstery. There’s leather and velour to choose from – show me another game where players get pumped for knitted fabric. You can cover the engine block and air filters, change the steering wheel, custom design dials and shift levers. Add new speakers and subwoofers in the trunk. And stick a bobblehead on the dash. The licence plates are customised too. It’s beautiful man. This is why Rockstar has dropped last gen consoles. It just can’t do that level of detail on older system. This shit is made to show off. Rolling in my 6-4, indeed.
Hitting those switches
Changes to the interaction menu mean we’ll be able to bounce the shit out of that motherfucker’s hydraulics whether inside or outside the whip. You can rev the engine, open the hood and trunk, flash the neons and crank up the speakers to full whack. This whole update is designed for the crews who run car meets every weekend. It’s pure fanservice from Rockstar (and it makes me hopeful for a future much-requested biker update too).
A fourth garage
Again, a much requested feature. Players will be able to buy a fourth property and the garage that comes with it. It won’t be enough for some, but for most they can dedicate a whole garage to their new lowriders. I expect to see MTV Cribs-style videos by Tuesday PM at the latest.
Machetes and a Tec 9
You can’t hoo ride without a Tec 9. Rockstar’s answer to the much-flaunted semi-automatic is a new Machine Pistol which arrives with the lowrider update. It’s one of the few weapons you can use while driving. There’s also a new Machete for when you have to get up close and nasty.
Big dog. Big nuts.
Lamar is back. After dropping you off in Los Santos as the start of your Online career, and occasionally helping out should you need to call in a mugging on another player, Mr Long Dick is taking a bigger role. With the lowrider update he’ll be providing new Missions, presumably of the drive-by and car-jacking kind. You know the M.O.
You can also look forward to three new adversary modes to keep you busy.
Benny was there all along
So Benny’s is the place to go and get your ride customised. It’s a new garage but it’s been on the map for a long time. As spotted by Mxckingbird, the location has been marked on Lester’s map as “Tuesday”. When does the DLC drop? This Tuesday. Pow.
The Moonbeam is back
Thanks to TezFunz for this pic. The Moonbeam is back, as predicted last month. It looks like a goddamn beast. You can also see the Faction from GTA IV is making a return, as well as variations on the Chino, Bucaneer, Voodoo and Primo. That’s your six lowriders, at least to begin with. “Six cars isn’t enough!” someone will inevitably cry. “Shut the fuck up,” I shall reply.
There’s a whole bunch of new clothes and accessories coming on October 20, as you’d expect. None have got the community as excited as the new varsity jackets. First seen in the Hunt the Beast mode in the Freemode Events update, Rockstar is finally making them available to all. Looking good, homepiece.
GTA Online’s Lowriders update hits October 20