SplatteredHouse has the right of this.
What you need to do is first sit down and look at what type of demographic you're trying to catch with this, and how much of which elements of your game you want to convey. If your game is story-heavy, then make sure that you put at least one compelling plot point/mystery in the trailer. If your game is action-based, show it at its most frenetic.
For a fantastic example of an indie trailer, check out Magrunner: Dark Pulse. That sold that game to me right then and there, because it understood me. It said "Hey, indie fan, this game has good stories in unusual settings which is something you kind of like. And here's some puzzling using a very innovative system we came up with ourselves. This is a novel experience, you'll like it." and I bought it, right then and there. (And I haven't regretted that purchase, Magrunner is really quite good.)
My best suggestion?
Take a good, long look at the content of your game and then consider which games it's closest to. It doesn't have to be exactly the same, it just has to share a degree of verisimilitude. Then look at the trailers on Youtube for the games it shares similarities with, and then create a trailer based upon what you've seen and get back to us.
See, I look at your first trailer right now and all it tells me is that you've got a decent artist or artists working for you -- and really, props to your artist. It also tells me that according to my tastes I think their art is being bogged down by how brown the game looks, but that's just me.
Then I look at your second trailer and all I get is a very generic third person shooter vibe and nothing more. You haven't done anything to give the trailer your own flavour, you haven't shown what makes your enemies unique, or your story/setting unique, you haven't shown any game mechanics which possess a degree of originality.
You need to go back to the drawing board and think about this. You need to think about the game you're trying to convey, and look at how others have done it.
I hope this helps.