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9 reasons video gaming is completely doomed

Tuesday, 29th April 2014 11:35 GMT By Patrick Garratt

Remember when video games were the future and no one was ever going to read anything ever again and movies at the cinema were going to be like massive games where you could pick the weather? Yeah? Scratch all that.

Video games are doomed. Here’s why.

1 – Microsoft and Sony left it too late

henry_viii

For a variety of reasons – money being the main one – Sony and Microsoft decided to make the last generation stretch approximately five centuries. Henry VIII was still on the English throne when Xbox 360 and PS3 launched. As a result, everyone got bored, loads of people went bust and now we have to wait another millenium for things to get interesting again. Assuming they ever do.

2 – Cross-development means years of compromised games

multitask

I know, they said. We’ll make new consoles. Yeah, they said, but what about the 200 million boxes we sold since Anne Boleyn’s execution? That’s fine, they said. We’ll just make sure everyone makes games for everything. But won’t that mean all the next-gen stuff’s rubbish for years? Yes. If you have a problem with that, then stop playing console games. OK, they said.

3 – Triple-A really has bitten the dust

cliff

Remember all those features we used to run about Christmas release schedules and all the lovely games you’d be getting in the third and fourth quarters? We don’t do those anymore. Why? Because there are about four major releases a year and the rest of the time’s spent crying about the halcyon epochs of grand success.

4 – Wii U is a case of history repeating

vitality_sensor

Wii U is an amazing thing. It’s also on the brink of disaster because hardly anyone’s making any games for it. You should still buy the Mario Kart bundle, regardless.

5 – Gaming’s the new skateboarding

wonder_woman

Skateboarding was massive and then it wasn’t. But it never went away. It developed. It’s still a beloved aspect of counterculture, but the dizzying hype is long gone. Seeing a parallel? Trends walk a tightrope: too much wobble (“Off with her head!”) and it’s safety net time.

6 – PC gaming’s on fire! (With tiny games)

burning_pc

Yes, PC gaming’s doing very well thank you very much, but are all those games releasing through Steam making money? What happened to the big PC title? You get about two a year, that’s what. Great for Valve. Not so great for everyone else.

7 – Free-to play is mainly terrible

dungeon_keeper

God. Free-to-play may be done correctly on occasion, but, and let’s be honest here, most F2P games exist solely to drill players harder than an NHS dentist on an alcoholic’s wisdom tooth. If that’s the future, we don’t have one.

8 – Discs are media’s drunk wedding uncle

drunk_uncle

The idea of buying discs in 2014 is like insisting on listening to your “tunes” on a Sony Walkman. So broken.

9 – No one cares

google_graph

This is the trends graph for Google’s “Computer & Video Games” category, complete with predictive results for 2015. Said Oscar Wilde: “There is only one thing in life worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.” Grim. Looks as though you’re going to have to do something else with your time in the future.

Tomorrow: This feature was a crock of shit. Come back tomorrow to see why video gaming will never die.

Images:

Multitasking
Wonder Woman on a skateboard
Burning PC
Dungeon Keeper
Drunk chap

Pac Man Skull

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24 Comments

  1. KAP

    Even though it was a “crock of shit,” there were surprisingly a glimmer of truth..

    #1 7 months ago
  2. Dragon

    As long as people want gaming experiences, they will stay, and in multitude of forms to satisfy to every significant group. Nothing is doomed unless it loses it support. That is why I laugh at people predicting console, pc, aaa etc. gaming is dead. The idea of gaming remains strong. The form of consumption will change (like VR etc.), but it will be video games.

    #2 7 months ago
  3. Joe Musashi

    Short of an apocalypse, I don’t think videogaming will die out.

    It has garnered wide-stream acceptance and become the biggest entertainment industry on the planet. Where once GTA would have to go cap in hand to licence music, the latest iteration was used as a platform for new artists to reach a wider platform on. The dominant role between music and game had reversed.

    Furthermore, as the years go by we find the generation of gaming sceptics move further and further into the background as, naturally, more and more people grow up with gaming as common as books and TV. The need to be accepted has gone, the hobby has matured and endured and is now part of the fabric of human recreation.

    As a footnote, that last point also shows why trading on history at the expense of keeping up with the rapid change in consumer demand returns increasingly meagre yields. The relevance of such a practice is drying up like a puddle in a hot summer’s day.

    In some ways, facets of gaming will always die. Gaming is constantly changing and evolving and with that come casualties. A company pulling out of the hardware market doesn’t mean hardware is under threat though. A game flopping doesn’t mean instant doom for its makers. And even when a company closes its doors, the human talent it housed will find a new home – somewhere.

    JM

    #3 7 months ago
  4. Panthro

    Console gaming has died for me, no longer serves a purpose for me at all.

    Exclusives are drying up and have became stale and that’s all they really have to go off.

    PC is booming for me at the moment though, had some of the best gaming experiences of my life in the last year.

    Once I was replaying games over and over because I didn’t have much choice of software, now I have a massive back catalogue full of games I am dying to play, all with very varying experiences.

    #4 7 months ago
  5. karma

    I’ve been an avid gamer since the venerable Atari 2600 and Commodore 64 back in the 80′s. And this lack of interesting games to play happened once before to me, in the mid 90′s when Companies like Ocean just kept pumping out the same old crappy movie tie-in one after another. It was platformer after platformer, and a litany of scrolling shooters and pretty much nothing else. Then a few years later Doom came out and fueled my imagination once more with its interactive 3D worlds and semi-realistic (for the time) gameplay, and back to being an avid gamer was I.

    Right now, i’m drifting away again and pretty much for all the reason stated in this article. Developers and Publishers need to know they are losing us. They are losing us because F2P, online only and inqonquestial Indie titles cannot possibly scratch any avid gamers itch in the same way that a deep and engaging AAA title can.

    Roll on Fallout 4.

    PS. I’m done with gaming if Bethesda pull an Elder Scrolls Online with it though.

    #5 7 months ago
  6. Panthro

    It is sort of cinema vs TV these days.

    Cinema is alright for the odd transformers/ super hero movie and get the very rare excellent movie like the hobbit but still nothing comes close to Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, 24, Sherlock, Dexter, Walking Dead, Sons of Anarchy, Sopranos, Boardwalk Empire etc etc etc.

    #6 7 months ago
  7. karma

    inconsequential. Fuck the edit button.

    #7 7 months ago
  8. pablo2008jedi

    The more the industry spouts out crap game the more people will stop paying and playing.

    How many CODs can we actually have? Its the same old copy & paste of code. There are very few innovations in gaming. The whole next gen is just the same crap in better graphics that brings it in line with PC games.

    I’ve been playing games since I was 5yrs old on the ZX Spectrum, I’d spend every bit of free time playing games. Now I’m in my late 30s I still play games, but not to the extent as I used and not because I don’t have the time, I do. I just don’t have the urge to play. DayZ was new and exciting, but right now its a bit bland in gameplay. All the PS4 indie exclusives are fun for 5 mins I download the PS+ games only to delete them after a quick playthrough.

    Never mind the price of games, for PS4 you still have the £50-55 bracket on 6 month old games…..

    #8 7 months ago
  9. NocturnalB

    Can’t wait till tomorrow Pat! Throw down the gauntlet like a true gaming champ homeslice!

    #9 7 months ago
  10. bradk825

    LOL, looking forward to tomorrow, now that you have me all depressed I’ll need the pick-me-up.

    #10 7 months ago
  11. salarta

    I wanna be Wonder Woman on a skateboard.

    #11 7 months ago
  12. bradk825

    @salarta Follow your dream Bro.

    #12 7 months ago
  13. briggstown

    The War on discs is very upper-middle-class. Check your ISP data limits before deciding to download a bunch of games. I’ve seen some Satelite ISPs with data limits of 30GB.

    #13 7 months ago
  14. Darkfield

    The industry is far from “doomed”, it’s just the fact that publishers realizing they can force feed us with crap made AAAs anymore. And teens who used to be the main video game consumers are each have smartphones and tablets and they spend far more times on them than any home video consoles.

    Consoles are losing their relevance because they have been replaced by mobile devices they offer nothing new that can’t be find anywhere else be it games or other types of entertainment. Wanna read lots of books? get a tablet! wanna what TV and Movies, on the go at that? get a smartphone and a tablet! wanna play lots of great games? Get a half decent PC and it’s twice as powerful as any consoles and guess what it can play games much better, more options and you could do a lot more on it than just playing games.

    So it’s the console business that is doomed, they are not looking good as the result of their poor performance the whole gaming industry is looking bad, which isn’t really, the best games you can play are actually those tiny games, they have more charm and value that a 5 hours play time you get on any console games. There aren’t many consoles game that I absolutely should play, with the exception of MGSV, I honestly could care less about consoles. Previously I planned to get a PS4, and that is out of the window now since I won’t be using it much, it would be sitting right next to my PS3 gathering dust.

    #14 7 months ago
  15. Gekidami

    The first point is really strange, its says:
    “As a result, everyone got bored, loads of people went bust and now we have to wait another millenium for things to get interesting again.”
    Yet the PS4 & XB1 are the best selling consoles of all time. How are people bored?

    Also, what history is the Wii-U repeating?

    #15 7 months ago
  16. NocturnalB

    @Gekidami Possibly, you’re unaware of the disclaimer at the foot of the article.

    #16 7 months ago
  17. Panthro

    @Gekidami

    Gamecube.

    People are bored, I only on a rare occasion talk to someone with a new console who is completely satisfied with there purchase, unless there mental state is already corrupted and they act like idiots towards people with other platforms.
    I remember getting a PS1/PS2/XboxOriginal/n64 and thinking they were the best consoles ever created as did all of my friends who also had them.
    I have a PS4 and it is a turd, a big floppy turd which only gets turned on these days for netflix.

    PC on the other hand, I am still as excited to boot up Steam today and find new games as I was when I first built my rig.

    I’m glad my stepfather paid for the PS4 otherwise I would have had to go through the channels of getting a refund for the sub standard gaming platform that it is, I can’t imagine what some of the Xbox One owners feel like, most of them probably still in hope things will get better, clutching on to Microsoft’s promises like an abused girlfriend.

    Hmmm.

    #17 7 months ago
  18. DarkElfa

    F2P and DLC aren’t killing gamin, but they are changing it into something that turns people off.

    #18 7 months ago
  19. fearmonkey

    Games are safe, though how we game and types of games we play will/might change.

    I agree with most points, and Patrick gets props from me for the Linda Carter pic :)

    The only thing I will say is AAA isn’t dead (which you will probably mention in the next article), it’s just the industry couldn’t keep making the huge expensive games without some guaranteed success. The industry got a bit crazy with it’s gaming budgets on iffy titles that even with huge budgets, couldn’t get it right to be a decent game. Thanks to that, companies and publishers folded. The big sellers on any system though are the AAA games, with smaller indie titles taking a smaller yet less costly to make piece of the pie.

    #19 7 months ago
  20. redwood

    “click bait” … wondering why did you guys even publish this pile of k-rap!

    #20 7 months ago
  21. Obernox

    :D

    #21 7 months ago
  22. salarta

    @redwood Wait a second, there’s Korean rap here? Where!

    #22 7 months ago
  23. Dragon

    @fearmonkey ,
    Those are exaggered notions of people who extrapolate their own preferences as market trends.
    AAA will never die, just like there will always be $150 million movies. Everything has an audience. GTA 5 sold 35 million units in about 6 months on “dead” consoles.
    I wonder if its that hard for people to realise that maybe some other people have different ways of consumption of entertainment. Obviously, I never heard any doomsayer bring up any tangible real world data to back their claim, probably because they cannot since its just their personal preference of wanting the form they don’t like (console/pc/aaa etc.) to die.

    #23 7 months ago
  24. FabioPal

    Please guys, don’t fall into the “list of N reasons why”. That’s a cancer for the Internet. And this article is, frankly, pointless.

    I’d love you to stick to what this site is all about: news.

    Love.

    #24 7 months ago

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